Too Much

To everyone

who’s ever told me

I’m too much:

You were right.

I shoved it down

Tempered it

Warped it

Hid it in the shadows

This too-muchness

I held my tongue

Smiled through pain

Because only good girls

Have a place here

But fuck having a place

at the cost of what’s real.

I am too much.

I am way too much.

All of life

lives here in these bones.

I am the tornado

that will leave your rubble in my wake, that you may build something new.

I am the monsoon

that will flood your soul with tears, that you may finally accept all that you have ever been.

I am the earthquake

that will shake your roots of their clinging and grasping to the earth, that you may grow strong and sturdy.

I am the forest fire

that will bring your soul to ash, that new beginnings may take root on its fertile ground.

I am the desert sun

burning hot and fierce, that you may become resilient and enduring.

I am the raging river

tearing through your canyons, that your sharp edges may be smoothed with time.

I am death itself

stripping you of all you are, that you may realize the truth of life.

I am life itself

allowing all things to be just as they are, that you may finally know the real meaning of love.

I never again could even dream

of being anything less

than too much.